The Compulsive Liar

Have you ever encountered someone who lies just to lie? I work with one...and it's a pharmacist! This woman must think that I, as well as the rest of her co-workers, are complete idiots. On Tuesday she tried to convince me that she had Calculus 3 in high school, as well as biochemistry, microbiology, and organic chemistry. Biochem?? Biochem was a pain in my ass - and I took it in my first year of pharmacy school. Calculus 3??? Isn't that was engineering majors take in college? What a dunce. The best story by far comes from our conversation yesterday in the IV room. I was in the hood making 10 IV bags - 4 vancomycin 1500mg in NS and 6 Rocephin 1g in NS. I had to stop making IVs because the bullshit was getting so deep I was afraid of contamination! She told me that she had her daughter by C-section (pretty believable). Her nurse anesthesist couldn't place the epidural and wasted half her dose on "test doses" (whatever the hell those are). Finally an orthopedic surgeon came up and gave her an epidural. Ok - my first question was, why would an ORTHOPEDIC surgeon be giving epidurals to women in labor?! The story only gets better from this point - and by the end, you may think that an orthopedic surgeon giving an epidural is plausible. (HA!) So the doctor wouldn't order any more medicine and she didn't get the full dose. Consequently, she could feel her C-section and move her legs (totally not possible). When I asked her if she could feel the pressure, she said, "Oh no, I could feel everything. I even moved my legs for him during the procedure." Right... The next miracle is that she was only in recovery for 10 minutes because she could lift her legs at a 45 degree angle with no problem. Well let's see - abdominal muscles have been cut and sutured. I'm sure doing abdominal activators is cake with sutures in place! Finally, she told me in 4 days post-surgery she was walking around Target shopping. Personally, I have never had a C-section, but my sister and sister-in-law both have had them. My sister is possibly the toughest person I know. She can tolerate some serious pain and she wasn't walking around Target 4 days post-surgery. I don't know how I kept a straight face during her conversation. Not only does this woman lie, but she's horrible at time management. I'm pretty sure she has ADHD. There were 20 prescriptions to be checked and the waiting area was full and she was running around telling everyone that she bumped her toe on the shelf. She's wearing thin on my patience. I don't like people who lie and I despise pharmacists that can't manage their time!!!!