Show Me Yours...
Today marks the second day of the last week of my sixth rotation. As with all other rotations, it's promising to go out with a bang. So far this week, I've been mooned, lost my preceptor, and watched a man just 4 hours after a heart attack lick PURE butter off his lips. Allow me to elaborate...
Being Mooned - Last week a 55yo WM came in to the ER complaining of severe leg pain. To make a long story short, he had a massive clot in his left leg which had totally occluded blood flow to the entire leg (hence the pain). He was given infusions to bust the clot and eventually had to have the clot surgically removed to save his leg. Yesterday, he was going for a walk down the hall...with his entire ass hanging out of the gown. Ok, it might be normal for a senile 88 yo man to walk with his ass hanging out, but it is NOT normal for a 55 yo man with good sense. To add insult to injury, he walked up to me and asked me to tie his gown for him with a twinkle in his eye. Thankfully my rotation partner, who happens to be male, stepped in. I had seen enough ass for one day.
Losing My Preceptor - He wanders aimlessly around the hospital and is time challenged. This usually doesn't bother me...unless it's 7AM and my ass is on time.
Licking Butter - I went in to talk with an 89yo WM this morning about his new Plavix therapy. At the time he was eating breakfast (which by the way is the most horrible smelling thing at the hospital - no matter what is on the tray). He took a break from his scrambled eggs and bacon only long enough to butter his toast with FOUR butter pats. There was so much butter on the toast that it left a milk-like mustache on his upper lip. I couldn't stop staring at it. And then found myself trying to control laughing at the totally absurd picture. I mean, honestly, here I was explaining the Plavix to keep his stents open, and he was eating butter by the gallon. I digress...
Being Mooned - Last week a 55yo WM came in to the ER complaining of severe leg pain. To make a long story short, he had a massive clot in his left leg which had totally occluded blood flow to the entire leg (hence the pain). He was given infusions to bust the clot and eventually had to have the clot surgically removed to save his leg. Yesterday, he was going for a walk down the hall...with his entire ass hanging out of the gown. Ok, it might be normal for a senile 88 yo man to walk with his ass hanging out, but it is NOT normal for a 55 yo man with good sense. To add insult to injury, he walked up to me and asked me to tie his gown for him with a twinkle in his eye. Thankfully my rotation partner, who happens to be male, stepped in. I had seen enough ass for one day.
Losing My Preceptor - He wanders aimlessly around the hospital and is time challenged. This usually doesn't bother me...unless it's 7AM and my ass is on time.
Licking Butter - I went in to talk with an 89yo WM this morning about his new Plavix therapy. At the time he was eating breakfast (which by the way is the most horrible smelling thing at the hospital - no matter what is on the tray). He took a break from his scrambled eggs and bacon only long enough to butter his toast with FOUR butter pats. There was so much butter on the toast that it left a milk-like mustache on his upper lip. I couldn't stop staring at it. And then found myself trying to control laughing at the totally absurd picture. I mean, honestly, here I was explaining the Plavix to keep his stents open, and he was eating butter by the gallon. I digress...
posted by ahsirt at 6:48 PM
1 Comments:
Things could be worse. At least the man had the gown on correctly. Imagine your surprise if he put it on backwards. As for the lost preceptor, I wish I would have lost a few of mine. And the EIGHTY-NINE year old, I don't blame him. If I was 89 and had to live to see the worst president in history violating all the civil liberties he probably fought for in WWII then I would try and kill myself with the other white meat and butter too.
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